Flashing as a Way of Living

It amazes me that I can walk down the street on any morning of the week wearing a mesh athletic pants (liner removed) and never get a stare. I've been getting a little more daring but still most people are just oblivious. I know when I am out walking or going somewhere, my eyes are constantly on the 'crotch watch' and looking at guys' butts. I guess that's is part of what makes me (I'm surely not alone here) work differently. Well, I sort of got a look for a guy in a passing car. He was working in the cemetery so saw him a minute later but he was not alone. I chickened out of strolling by -- he was busy. It's getting cooler so the mesh pants won't work too much longer.

I have been asked where I got these pants. I know several online underwear and sportswear stores

have them but those are more expensive and more see-thru than you might need. I found these at either Walmart or Kmart - but Sears or JCPenny, etc would have them - although more expensive. (US but I'm sure there are equivalent stores in the UK and Australia - I'm not sure about continental Europe, however, they are probably manufactured in China, so they're likely to be found anywhere. They are in men's athletic or sportswear section. Sometimes you can find a bargain price. Check the size of the mesh on the outer layer. Some have a very tiny mesh but these were a larger weave - allowing more visibility. If you can take out the lining only on the front of the pants - so that when heads turn the pants will look like ordinary ones. If you lucky enough to be noticed, then at least they can just wonder if they really saw your cock or just the illusion of it.

Being a closet flasher I enjoy wearing my mesh shorts or athletic pants (liner removed) outdoors. Amazingly however, I rarely get noticed -- even when I don't wear a long shirt that would cover up the fact that I'm freeballing and hanging loose. There are different sized mesh weaves so the amount of transparency varies on the garment and whether it's sunny or cloudy (amount of light) affects how see-thru they appear.

For the first time in a pretty long while, I actually did get noticed. I went out about 7 a.m. the other day wearing my long mesh pants to take a morning walk -- without my dog. Lately I've been taking the dog out and hour or so later than that. Along came

someone on a bicycle who I've seen in the neighborhood before but haven't for a long time. He's a gardener / landscaper who works at a nursery nearby.
I remember him because he's used come early to pick up the company truck parked in a lot across from where I live. He would arrive on his bicycle and then proceed to stand sideways out in front the parked vehicle and take a long piss (just about every morning). I had noticed this habit - not because I was spying on him - but I'd see him when I came out to get the paper, looked out the window, He was apparently not deliberately exposing himself -- at least from my viewpoint.

          Yet I always wondered if he were sort of doing it on purpose. If he's coming to work by

bicycle, his own place couldn't be that far away. For a year or so, his company uses a different parking lot for their vehicles so I've not seen him taking a morning piss. Well, that other morning, as he rode passed me on his bicycle his eyes centered in on my freeballing cock in these mesh pants which was just hanging partly below my shirt. He turned in from a side road and so his view of it was just a short glance, but he definitely reacted. Because he had earphones on, as was listening to music, he could not heard himself but I heard him mumbled just as he passed me 'goddamn! or something like that, doing a double take.

Somehow I don't think he was not as shocked as he was surprised -

maybe even delighted -- that there was somebody in his neighborhood he would do what he's been thinking about so long (his pissing in public was just his way of innocent flashing). So I now I think he might have been getting his own thrills as he 'innocently' pissed in public ever morning.
I know there are many -- if not most freeballers - who do wear no underwear for a lot different reasons than the thrill of accident exposure. But I think there might at least be a element of thrill of being seen for a good many -- even showing a VPL (visible penis line) through your pants/short that are NOT mesh must be appealing to some freeballers. Wearing mesh and semi-transparent or see-thru or ripped clothes with holes while freeballing is more further step along in that direction.

By the way, beside mesh pants/short does anybody get off wearing ripped jeans? I've got some old ones I cut off as short but they are full of holes in the crotch so somebody can get a look at skin and maybe more when I wearing them while freeballing.

On a morning walk in the cemetery a few days back, I pulled off my pants - always wear a loose fitting cargo pants and freeball. So it's easy to quickly do a bit of 'stealth flashing' -- I call it 'stealth' since I don't believe anybody is watching. It's just the fact that they might or could at any moment -- there are cars intermittently passing along a lane about 50 m behind me. I got excited and just seconds later starting jerking off until I cum.

Showing 'face' when your flashing or 'innocently' exposing yourself to strangers is actually less

risky than doing so on the Internet. I mean there are only a limited number of people who actually see you and many don't really 'see' you at all. Even if they do, they don't want to act on it (confront your personally or even call the police and press charges) and then they don't have 'proof' - just their word against your.

I was once arrested for lewd conduct charges (a felony in Mass). It happened while on vacation near Provincetown in 2005. It was a police who saw me -- although I was just 'pissing,' which I was, he claimed I was trying to flash

him (I was wearing a skimpy see-thru pair of shorts but he could not have seen that from the distance he was when he first noticed me). I was not convicted -- of course --the case was dismissed because it was a case of false arrest/police brutality / insufficient evidence / unlawful seizure of evidence (my camera), I obtain the services of a local lawyer who had experience with this particular police department. It seems they often made this kinds of arrest in order to discourage 'perverts' from coming into their community - -not Provincetown township but another one further down (south) the Cape.
But the whole trauma of the experience taught me some valuable lessons. For one, it made me

realize how vindictive and self-righteous some people are -- including well-meaning and hardworking police officers -- most of whom I have a great deal of respect for the dedication. But flashing on the net or letting your face get shown may have some risks that you cannot control or may not even realize until years later. Thanks, Toras, for being encouraging without be condescending. I have lived in communities where a Caucasian male (which I am ) is a rare minority , so it means I would have no trouble being picked out of a police line-up. Toronto has a very multi-ethnic community - there are about 800,000 people of Chinese origin alone live in great Toronto -- at least you can 'pass' for a local. I can't where I am living now - that's why I guess I went overboard last summer and was a little bit too careless while vacationing on Cape Cod.

I thought I blended in as to be unrecognizable. The other interesting phenomena and also could make flashing (exposing one's genitals and face) on the Internet somewhat riskier for people who define themselves as flashers, exhibitionists and exposers is 1) the tendency for the Christian right to categorize them as sex offenders -- the same as child rapists and baby killers, and 2) the new Internet technologies for tagging pics, passing data including pics and tags through RSS feeds even further around the globe, and geotagging - ties/links an Internet object (user, picture, file) to a specific geographic spot. I know this is off-topic , but it was my topic (Walking the Dog) in the first place so I doubt the moderator's will mind. I usually do a lot of thinking while I am 'walking the dog' which is both a metaphor for 'wagging the wiener', freeballing in the open air, airing out the family jewels. But it also is REALLY what I am doing -- taking my pet dog for his daily walks.

I also think about flashing both as my hobby and also about it repercussions and consequences too

- while I'm enjoying the solitude and occasional chance to peek-flash some guy (see separate, earlier posts for the narratives) Back the thesis -- We know there is tracking of what you purchase and even what you're interested in (sites that you have visited leave cookies that search engines can pick up and then display ads that are related to the types of sites (products) you've been visiting. Google does that big time. So it's not too big of a stretch to think that pics (or other data files or media objects), which you download or that you place on your website or public / private profile on some social network, or that you even look at briefly online, might leave discernible and followable traces.

I've got profiles all over the net and many pics with and without my face -- both under my real name and my various alias (sunbuns is not my 9-5 working world identity). Someday somebody is going to find a way (my conspiracy instinct says they already have) to collect these traces (tags) or at least connect them like dots. So they'll start selling the information (clandestinely of course) for ostensibly purposes of security and anti-criminal protection but the personal id info will most certainly also be used to defame and try to ruin the reputations of people (basically good upstanding citizens -- like me and you) for political gain, religious cleansing, or profit from blackmail or pay-offs. Sorry to take a sinister lapse into the dark side of the net... Hey, it's my real birthday today.

I'm 49 - yep! Uh huh! Like, right. Well...., at least 'sunbuns' thinks he is or at least won't admit to being any older than that - and he usually says he's younger). I remember a comment your once made in another posting -- most of the people on this site (who are interesting in or doing flashing) are in the 40s and 50s. In honor of the fact that I'm chicken to show my face here's another pic -- not only faceless but too headless from one my walking-the-dog hikes into the local cemetery. If I get any more 'invisible' - I might as well be dickless. Sometimes I think it will be good to be reborn as a dickless being (a female?) in my next life. If I am not recognizable, may be my dog will be.
On the public profiles, I was referring to in my post above is located at Dlist -- a gay social networking site (I feel like a 'old' man among the 'twinkish' - hipster GQ types plastered all over the home page. But what the hell -- I like college age dudes - and sometimes they like a guy who's more mature and obviously well-endowed (I don't mean 'big' dicked). http://www.dlist.com/sunbuns

If you visit it, you can see a slide show of guys showing off in public. Which means that

ANYONE can see the photo and the profile - if someone is savvy enough they can probably find out my IP address from the uploaded pics or code. So -- it's not all just conspiracy. Someday I'll be knowledgeable enough to prove my thesis by showing you exactly how it might work. I collect such pics and thousands of others. I am turned on more by 'real' photos of real guys getting nude and being naked, male and happy about it, than the slick, hard-glossed superstuds and huge meaty cocks of the porno models. I have them in Flickr and a few thousand save in Yahoo Photos - only friends can see them - unlike Dlist and GW - my profiles and pics are password protected. I realize it is not much security (protecting one's identity from theft or blackmailing/blackballing) but usually like-minded people of the same persuasion join a gay or porno site.
[NOTE about these photos of other people: The guy above (with the cut-out face) and below with the big cock are 'flashing' friends. NudeforaThrill was a 'nudebeach' buddy who let me take some photos of him on San Diego's Black's Beach, but recently he's seemed to disappear from 'view', meaning he's not active on certain sites and doesn't seem to want to talk. Matt below is the famous Nitroxflash. ]

That's not the case with these two new entries, GW and Dlist. Even Yahoo 360, MySpace and Tribe.net don't allow just anyone to see a profile (or at least the parts you don't want made public). I am pasting the link the Slide.com slideshow below and I'll try to embed the player here too (if HTML for the slide show doesn't work into this post, then you can see it at my dlist profile above or at the link below.
The ultimate expert on dickflashing is Matt - better known as Nitroxflash. He seems to be taking a hiatus from his blog on the subject but it has lots of useful past entries: Nitroxflash's blog.
Do white mesh shorts show off better than black? That's what I've heard -- but I don't have any light colored ones to test that out. Of course, it matters how much direct light (sunlight) there is and the width of the mesh opening, how reflective the material is too.

I just posted this video (it's from last year) at GayWatch.com, but I think you can view it here:
http://www.gaywatch.com/view_video.php?id=1305

It was a rare treat -- not only getting buck naked on a public beach -- but improvising a dildo out of a cucumber that I stopped and bought on the way to the beach. Wish you'd been there to view me -- it's a sometimes cruisy area where guys go out to sun themselves nude, but frequently there is sex play (mutual - not just alone like mine) in and among the brush and low dunes. Local fisherman often come up along the beach and stay for a long time. Tourists and people out enjoying the beach could have caught me dickflashing with the anal toy inserted. Keep me hard -- I saved cumming for a little later trip back closer to Waikiki (where more secretive nudity and male-to-male cruising goes on.

Gran Canaria: Gay paradise at east end of the Mediterranean Sea near Spain and Morocco

Compared to the northern climates (esp US, Canada, Northern Europe) in February, even Portugal's winter will probably seem warm - although the ocean is still too cold for most

people. Culturally and for sight-seeing, Portugal and Morocco would be your best bet for a 'warmer' winter vacation. However, with that being said, I'm a sucker (literally too) for the great sand dunes at Maspalomas on the southern end of the island of Gran Canaria. I've visited  times times it the last seven years during March.  Daytime temperatures range from 18-24 degree celsius - generally toward the higher end,  but clouds and rain (or Saharan winds bring yellow sand) are not completely uncommon.

      For a gay holiday, it's a fun place - although the men seem to be ranging toward the

middle-age and older bracket. Younger guys (teens-20-30s) are abundant enough but they're usually traveling in groups and as couples so it's harder to 'meat' them. I recommend staying in Playa del Ingles - since it's got everything and is closer to the Yumbo (main shopping center that also has most of the gay clubs, including several sex clubs, backroom bars.)

You have to plan a bit to get the right transportation routing to be able to visit all three places affordably and on a set 


Me, hiking nude in the dunes at Maspalomas.

schedule. There are not really many flights from Morocco to the Canary Islands . Since there are Spanish territory, you'll find more flights and better fares from Spain (or even London (Gatwick) and even Germany. By the way, there are thousands of older Northern European seniors who descend on Gran Canaria en masse - it's a bit like Florida in the US in the winter. They come for the sun and cheap food - menus are in 7-8 languages (mostly North European).

Don't count out Spain as a connecting point between all your 3 destinations. Spanair (a Star 

Alliance member) has lots of flights to all 3 places and you can sometimes get good discounts - although they are more than just this airline serving them.

Seville - not far from the Spain-Portual border is a great sightseeing town and it's warmer there than Madrid or Lisbon. Also there are flights to Gran Canaria from Seville. You can also reach Morocco easily from Seville. Sample itinerary: Start at Lisbon (you can also end up there by doing the following in reverse)- It's lovely place for several grand days of sightseeing (city views, palaces, art and history, great dining), If you have time, try to go north to Fatima for a 'religion' touristic experience, which was the site of the mystic appearance of the Virgin Mary to 3 teenagers that reoccurred every year since 1923?). Sunday morning is the best time to visit Fatima - since that's when all the pilgrims / sufferers come to receive healing (walking on the knees) to mass.

Then travel south stopping perhaps at Evora or along the coast west of Lisbon, then go along the south coast (the Algarve) by train / bus to Spain (Seville).There are nice seaside

resorts along the way (best in summer of course), or stop at the far west, Cabo de St. Vincente. This is where Columbus studied at King Henry the Navigator's school, located on the southern most eastern tip of Europe. I also loved stopping at Tavira, a quaint seaside town with a unofficial nude beach (probably still too cool for most beachgoers in March, but great during the warmer months. There are bus and trains to Spain from Tavira. Nearby is the town of Cadiz, from where Columbus set sail for the New World; it is a nice side trip. It was his first land fall at Gran Canaria, and where he always stopped (at least 4 times) to replenish supplies. If you have time on Gran Canaria, you can visit the Columbus House, where he stayed during these stopovers and see the little museum and also the Cathedral nearby.

This is a photo of a horse-drawn buggy for rent in the plaza just outside the Cathedral of Seville. 

By the way, Columbus' body is buried at the Cathedral in Seville - which is one of the most outstanding church building in the world (converted once to mosque during the Moorish occupation and then back to a cathedral ) Once you hit Spain and see Seville (worth at least two days), you can fly to Gran Canaria (or try a hydrofoil or passenger ferry from the south of there (near Gibraltar) to Tangiers in Morocco. (check out schedules because there may be seasonal limits). Tangiers give you just a taste of Morocco - hardly the best and even maybe a distaste - because you'll be swamped by self-declared 'tour guides' who just want to make bucks ( a lot - if they can rip you off) to walk with you in tow around town and then end up taking you to a relative's restaurant or carpet or souvenir shop to try to bargain down ridiculously over priced meals or items. Traveling in Morocco alone and without a clear head and definite plans can be a bit daunting - maybe things have changed since I visited there a decade ago. If you fly into Casablanca or another city with hotel reservations and a set timeframe, you'll probably be less likely to get lured into going along with some cute Moroccan young guy who's just flirtatious enough - with a smiling face to beguile you. I took the train from Tangiers to Fez and was fortunate enough to meet a school teacher who ended up inviting me to his home and having a meal with his family.

Gran Canaria (Canary Islands, Spain)	Follow up: hardfuck2 Wow! Sunbuns99. You travel along way just to visit Gran Canaria. I think it's great that you do. You obviously enjoy yourself there. good News for you. there is a €400 million facelift in the pipeline next year for Playa del Ingles and the Yumbo centre. should be interesting to see will everything remain the same or will be try to drive out all the sex. they would be mad if they did cause the gay people bring so much money into the area...
	Follow up: sunbuns99* 12 Oct 2007, 11:40 I've been to Gran Canaria five - six times around St. Patrick's Day .. I guess you might have been one of the Irish who was celebrating during one of those times. There are lots of Irish pubs and the day brought out a parade and dancing in the streets. That' s interesting about the facelift / renovation. Do you know when construction will begin and be due for completion? I don't know if I'd enjoy visiting it while that is going on. P.S. Have you been to any of the other Canary Islands? How's the gay / nudist scene of Tenerife, Lanzarote, etc.?
Nudists on the beach at Maspalomas	Follow up: hardfuck2 12 Oct 2007, 18:34 Nudity is allowed on all the islands but Gran Canaria has the busiest gay scene. Tenerife is next and the Lanzarote and Fuerteventura. If I were you I would take a ferry over one of the other islands for a couple of days to have a look. check out www.fredolsen.es. its in spanish but its easy to work your way around the site as parts of it does come up in english. not sure when work is going to begin. it just said next year sometime. i'm heading over to GC next week, I'll see if i can find out anything about it then and let you know, Keep in touch. this will be my 25th visit.. lol ...I go 2 or 3 times a year...x
	Sunbuns - nude and cruising in the dunes of Maspalomas, March 2011

Follow up: 13 Oct 2007, 06:26 I saw your post on the travel forum about Gran Canaria. I'm going and don't know whether to stay at Tucanes Club Beach Boys or Villas Blancas. Any tips on those or other places? From Sunbuns99 To: Midtown2 I haven't stayed at either place. For two reasons, I go to GC mainly because of the natural setting and also the dunes - being naked and cruising with dozens (if not hundreds) of men occupies my days - so I'm not spending time lounging around at the pool (probably clothing optional at those two gay hotels). I'm also alone when I travel - not a couple as you might be - so you might have a different 'purpose' for your trip - enjoying each other - so a nicer accommodation be best. I love the natural settings /diving/ hiking/ but that's available lots of places so GC is about a gay (sex) vacation (at least in large part for me).. so I'm either out enjoying cruising the dunes and clubbing at night and doing the outdoor stuff during the days - I don't spend much time at the hotel. Therefore, I prefer to stay at a cheaper place (preferably with a kitchenette) and then I can make more trips per year (to other places). Of course, it's easier to make friends at a cozier, gay hotel so that has it's advantages too. BTW, if you decided to look for different hotels, I have had pretty good luck with a UK site called, alpharooms.com I recommend staying right in Playa del Igles so you can be within walking distance of the gay clubs and the beach and dunes. Otherwise, you'll have to take taxis or buses everywhere. The main airport is just south of Las Palmas (large port city on the north tip of the island), you can either take a taxi to your hotel (about 40 euro), but there is also a city bus (#60) leaving for south (Maspalomas-Playa del Igles) (Be careful there is also the same 60 north so don't get on the one going the wrong direction - I did that! ) for much cheaper 3-4 euro --- although need to know where to get off for your hotel. When are you going? I've been the last 3 years in March but I'm not sure I will go again next year -- or try another time of year. Kelly REPLY from Midtown2  Thanks for the info. We are a couple who had been together for 18 years so we are out cruising for sex too. We aren't going until next August but I just booked the flight because you have to book on Delta as soon as the tickets become available to fly for free using miles. We are going to Sitges first. We go there every year and stay at the liberty hotel. We walk to Playa del Muerte every day which combines the cruising, hiking, and nudity into a day long adventure. for the second half of the trip we are going to GC which sounds kind of like Palm Springs on an island. Have you been to http://www.basementstudiosgc.co.uk/? Reply from Sunbuns99: I guess you could call it that the Palm Springs of Gran Canaria Island. Like Palm Springs, it's also more popular in the winter than summer,  but I don't think Gran Canaria would have the same high summer temps. Wow.. I didn't know about the Basement Studios - looks pretty wild - sex in and out of the room 24/7 and the staff will participate if invited (see FAQ). There are a couple of sex clubs in the Yumbo Centre (ground floor) - bars with dark, back rooms, harness slings, wall-to-wall rutting men (it was fun!) Since they cater to tourists, there isn't that strict a dress code at the bars. I guess some might and you do have to strip and leave all your clothes checked (in a bag) when you get in. The strict dress (or undress code) at Basement Studios would cramp my style too much , but the prices - 2 persons 85-100 euro a night are not TOO bad. Still, I have usually stayed for around 30-40 euro / night, but I explained. You certainly get more action that the typical gay hotel - I just wonder how it is in August? Also did you read the additional posting on the Travel Forum (by hardfuck) - he mentioned some major construction (renovation) due to start next year - he's headed to Gran Canaria next week and will try to find out how it might affect the Yumbo and other places. Kelly REPLY from Midtown2  Photo of some greenery among the vast sands of the Maspalomas dunes. Just barely visible are nude people hiking in the sand and seeking shade.

Experiencing a Tribe for Real - - Life in a Hostel (sic) Environment

Originally posted on Tribe.net Blog

I love hostel stays.

Hostels are really great places for potential and sometimes actual CMNM experiences. More than the erotically suggestive nature, the real chance to meet people from all walks of life and to become authentic -- even if only temporarily - buddies or friends. There is just something about being a fellow sojourner that brings out the 'best' in a person (well.. I think it does for me). I've posted on this topic before but there's not very much reaction - although my take on hosteling (and the pleasure it affords) has changed recently.

In some ways, being on Tribe.net (also some of the other alternative life-style social networking sites ) is a lot like living in a hostel with a set of unique and slightly strange (if not almost perverted) bunk of quirky people. In real life, there aren't that many places - in the modern and average working-man world -- that you can really let your hair down and let your personality and anatomy all hang out (LOL - in a manner of speaking). On a recent stopover trip to NYC, I had intended to stay in a hostel situation. But unfortunately, I couldn't get a reservation at any place I really want to 'experience'. So I settled on another kind of alternative accommodations: the YMCA Club hotels - this time the West Side YMCA.

 I realize I am getting a bit off-subject but it IS directly or indirectly related to CMNM or male-to-

male flashing. Saunas (gay sex clubs/baths) are not totally banned in NYC but it seems that true gay baths ALMOST are- unless you don't count East Side Club or the West Side Club. While I was staying at the West Side YMCA, I visited the West Side Club (no relation, similar name only) on two nights and found it OK enough to go back for more. They charged an initial membership fee ($15?) but you get a 30-day member's card, which allows for 5 visits (just pay for a room (or locker). I recommend a room and it's customary to give a tip to the staffer who leads you to your room. There were a variety of men but there was virtually no sex in the corridors or open areas - it was confined to the private rooms with the doors closed -- which was somewhat disappointing.

At West Side Club, the is only one small shower room, and the sauna was not working (or appeared to be closed) - which may be connected to fact that the sauna room was also closed at the West Side YMCA, where I stayed two nights. At the Y, a sign was posted saying that it was closed by order of the City Board of Health. Was it just this one that had not passed inspection or is the NYC Board of Health systematically shutting down all public saunas? Sort of like - cleaning out the porn and prostitutes out of Times Square? Go figure.

I have love staying at hostels - not just for the economy, and also not just because I have an 'excuse' to be naked in front to strangers (which is always fun), but I have found now that they are enjoyable even more for the chance for camaraderie and acceptance from new acquaintances and potential friends. Initially, I saw it as a way to flash people whose reactions you could see and who can't quite run away. But now, I find that being accepted for being myself is working like a kind of therapy and giving me less reason/compulsion to 'flash' or get naked in front of strangers (not that I ever really did it blatantly anyway - but the fantasy and compulsivity had been growing for the last few years whether I actually acted on it or not).

More recently, I have found that I really enjoy getting to know the people I am 'living' with in the hostel. I guess it comes from my not acting anything but myself -- I feel free to be me - kinky, profane, but passionate, caring, and adventurous too.

 I seemed to be (socially) rewarded for the very things that might be 'pervs' in someone else's book. So I've started to see hostels in a whole new light. Still, there are not all like that. I guess it depends on how long you stay - and whether your roomies are ready and willing to socialize. It also matters whether they are willing to accept your 'uniqueness' (diversity - differences in sexual persuasions - i.e. being gay or a nudist or an exhibitionist.)








Maybe it has everything to do with the location (what hostel, in what city/country, and what the social context is). It was a mixed room for 8 with of them 2 women (who were not together) in Honolulu. We did things together - like going out to clubs, dancing, taking in local sites (North Shore Sunset Beach), swimming and even skinnydipping late on night. Using the same bathroom, shower, watching each other change in the room and at the beach was a kind of therapy -- in one sense. My nudity in the room was either overlooked or just accepted - as was everyone else's. I found I didn't really feel the need to be the perv, who made others leary or uncomfortable (with this group).

I did get naked and erect for the 'benefit' of my opposite bunkmate, but he either didn't care or really didn't notice. Because later, we ended up spending a couple of days together (on another island). I guess too that my personality sort of balanced the one overly macho str8 guy who also seemed to like getting nude, too - although seemed possessed with chasing skirt 24/7. In that setting, he was more like the 'pervert', a ex-crazed, testosterone-drenched horny dog. So I didn't' need or couldn't take that role. He's been traveling for a year and had had some bad experiences so I guess he was 'acting' out like some kind of kid (which he was at 23). He's lost his travel partner and best friend - who had gotten hooked on drugs while in the Caribbean and had had to be shipped home for hospitalization to the Netherlands). There was some secret intrigue (not me) with some gay hanky panky going on between one of our roomies and a guy next door which complicated things. Why they tried so desperately to cover it up (without much success) was beyond me. Overall, it was a very nice time.

A few weeks later, I spent a night in a hostel in NYC (Gershwin Hotel has both private and dorm-style rooms). Life was back to normal -meaning -- I didn't even speak to my roomies (two other young men) except in the dark when I came in after 11pm. There was just one roommate in the room and he appeared asleep. I stripped in the darkened room and took a shower, leaving the door unlocked (on purpose). The second roommate came in and opened the door to the bathroom catching me fully nude. When I came out and finished dressing, he was in bed, pretending not to notice. I had to leave early the next morning but gave him a lot to look at that night since we were the ones on the two bottom bunks. While in NYC, I looked up some other possible hostels. I believe that WestSide Inn (107st) was promising.

Are there other hostels or hotels in NYC that anyone can recommend?

The CMNM dynamic drives a lot of men to explore 'gay' issues

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